Are you on the fence about whether or not it’s time to end your relationship? Do you sometimes wonder if you’re wasting your time on someone who is never going to be your future?
If you think it might be time to end things with your boyfriend, consider these 8 signs that the road of your relationship isn’t leading anywhere good.
Partners trust each other and have no reason to tell lies. If you find out he’s keeping a secret from you, ask yourself what he’s trying to hide. Does he have a past he doesn’t trust you to understand? Is he in financial or legal trouble? These are things committed people reveal to each other.
If you find out he’s lying to you about where he spends his time or who he is with, you need to have a serious conversation. There is no future in a relationship without trust.
Do you ever just cuddle up together to enjoy being close to one another, or does every physical encounter end up with the two of you in bed?
An active sex life is a wonderful thing, but it should be balanced with other forms of intimacy. Holding hands or just reaching out to touch each other as you pass are signs of a deep, emotional bond. If it’s all about sex, ask yourself what is holding the two of you together in other ways.
When you reach the stage in your relationship where you are ready to commit, your lives will begin to meld into each other’s. Joint bank accounts and other financial entanglements are part of living as a team.
If he says that he’s ready for a commitment but withholds his financial information, it could be a red flag. Talk to him about his concerns. He could be hiding debt, or maybe he’s spending his money in a way that he thinks you wouldn’t approve. Maybe he just isn’t ready to trust you with money. You need to know what he’s thinking.
If you’ve been dating a while, it’s likely that you’ve met and spent time with his family and closest friends. If you haven’t, that could signify a problem.
Most people are excited to introduce their partners to family and friends. They want to show you off and share what they’ve found. If he’s holding back, there’s a reason.
The issue could be that his family knows something he doesn’t want to reveal to you, such as a close relationship with an ex or even a child he hasn’t told you about. When people don’t want to combine separate parts of their lives, often there’s a secret involved.
You also have to consider the possibility that he’s embarrassed by you. If that’s the case, you definitely want to think about ending things.
It’s also possible that he is embarrassed by his family, and that’s why he hasn’t introduced you. Perhaps his family has acted inappropriately in the past, and it has damaged his relationships.
If he trusts you, he should be willing to talk to you about this. Pay close attention to his reasoning. Sometimes people who cannot get along with their families will not make good partners. But if his family is truly toxic, he could be protecting you by keeping you away.
When you are in a relationship with someone, you can expect to be included in all his social media accounts. There is no good reason for him to block you from any pictures or posts he makes. In fact, you should be central to many of his online activities.
If you discover that he’s keeping secret accounts or blocking you from certain activities, you need to find out why. Chances are, he’s not being honest.
Are you always the first one to text or call? Are you the one who makes plans and keeps the relationship moving along?
If he’s not making contact at least some of the time, it’s a good indication that his heart’s not in it. If you’re on his mind, he’ll be reaching out to you the same way you are reaching out to him.
If you’re concerned about this, talk to him. If he has an exceptionally demanding job or is struggling with something in his personal life, it could be affecting his ability to communicate. Encourage him to share this with you.
Your phone contains a lot of personal information as well as a record of who you’ve been talking to and what you’ve been doing. Partners who trust each other don’t worry about the other seeing what’s on their phones. They aren’t doing anything wrong, so they have nothing to hide.
If your partner seems to hide his phone from you, there might be a problem. Does he jump to answer texts and messages and then act vaguely about who they are from? Does he silence calls immediately and not tell you who it was?
Unless he’s planning a surprise party for you, there is no good reason for him to guard his phone.
When you bring up one of these topics or other concerns about the relationship, he should give you his full attention and be willing to talk. If he truly cares about your relationship and is keeping no secrets, he will welcome the opportunity to make you feel secure.
A person who is hiding something is likely to ignore you when you want to talk about your worries. Worse, he might get defensive and aggressive with you. If this is the case, he’s feeling anxious about something he doesn’t want you to know.
Relationships aren’t always perfect, but trust is a very important component of a relationship with a positive future. If you’re seeing any of these signs, start digging into the reasons why. You deserve to know where his heart is, and he’ll be honest with you if he loves you and values what you have together.
If your boyfriend is evasive or won’t give you a straight answer, it may be time to cut ties. Problems you don’t solve now are only going to get bigger and more painful. If you can’t be honest with each other, ending it is probably the right choice.
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